I'm waiting for Mars, my ruling planet, to align itself in the seventh house - the house of love and partnership. You would think I would want Venus there. Surely, she could bestow upon her loyal subject the grace and beauty of true love. But the goddess of love has not granted my wish. The queen of all things feminine has softened my heart into putty for commitment-phobic hands. It has taken me months to recover from the meltdown of the fickle flame that fizzled out as soon as the word "exclusive" came out of my mouth. And it wasn't a question like, "Can we be?" or "Are we?" It was simply a statement of fact - " I am seeing you exclusively." I said it as a way to say, "I like it here. I'm not going anywhere."
Of course, I wanted a progression - a year long construction on a solid foundation, not a house hastily built during the frenzy of the real estate bubble. When he said, "This is not working out," he might as well have flung a brick at my head and knocked me unconscious. Unconscious was the way I felt - walking around numb to the pain and suppressed anger - vulnerable prey for the next vulture singing promises of friendship and love.
Venus made me too weak for the game of love. She told me to let down my defenses, wear my heart on my sleeve. I need Mars to take the reigns - reinforce the troops and bolster their spirits. He will invent a different strategy and plot out a new course of action. He's an expert at the game of love - and he plays to win!
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Writing exercise for Written Word - pick a color and write down what you associate with it, then right about that. This version is slightly different from what I read during the workshop.
The Living Poetry Project and NEVERMORE
8 years ago
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