Letting Go

The shock has faded
when I see you in dreams
alive in your late 40s
frozen at the age you were
when I saw you every day.
This time you tried to protect me
even though I am old enough
to take care of myself
even though I’ve grown accustomed
to your absence.
Part of me still longs for her daddy
to scare away monsters
as if mortgages and heartbreak
dissolve in the light.
I wish I knew how to conjure you up
make your image play
on the screen behind my eyes
so this dehydrated heart
can drink up
the last bit of sleep.

What to Do at the End of the Line

Like a kitten
that crawled past
the edge of the bed
I must decide
to claw
back to the top
or hope
I land on all fours.

Hopeless

A penny
with a hole
a sock
behind the dryer
One has no hope
to be found;
the other
is not worth
finding.

Just What I'm Hoping For

A real lover
looks good
when he walks
a good catch.

He’s been there
he’ll be there
he’s there.

He stays
waits
sees you
through.

~ From Adele “Daydreamer”

Not Thinking of You

I don’t care what he wants
when he’s lonesome,
feelin’ love starved.

When I hear him say:
Let’s get away, go somewhere!
Can we?

I don’t care!

Look at my love floating away.

~ From Aretha Franklin “Day Dreaming”

Parents' Night Out

After we’ve kissed the
little ones goodnight
promise to pay
the babysitter extra
for staying past midnight
we go
giddy as teenagers
headed a house party
we drive
two-seater with the top down
shake our roles out in the wind
we dance
like maniacs
all ten thousand of them
transported to that place
when we could
drop to our knees
lean way back
playing air guitar.

Exhausted

Night
Chicago flight
home to Durham
delayed for three hours
due to “weather” in Missouri
which sounds better than tornado outbreak
but has the same effect:
I wait even longer
to find sleep
my bed
collapse.

Earth Speaks

I watch the needle creep
to 75 in the 55 zone,
look for red flashing lights
in the rear view while miles
of green stream past. When you face
the sun to warm us, I squint
fumble with the visor, fish
inside my purse for shades.

I don’t see which blue
you have painted the sky
or the shape and depth
of the clouds drifting above.
You want to tell me something,
but I can’t hear, until the rain forces me
to monitor the speed of the wiper blades,
take the car out of warp drive.

According to What They Say

They say shaking a weight
for just six minutes a day
will shape and tone flabby arms.
But when I tried to exercise this way
it caused my shoulder harm.

They say asparagus
is a miracle cure for cancer
when cooked and pureed.
But it only turned my urine green
and made it smell for days.

They say the greeting card virus
would infect my computer
then turn it into a zombie.
But when I deleted all emails
I missed the friend’s discount at Abercrombie.

They say all these things
to help or protect me
but none of it turns out to be true.
Should I listen to them or to myself?
Dear Lord, please tell me what to do!

Can't Look Ahead or Look Back

I am somewhere
between past failures
and future mistakes.
Boxed-up memories
left miles behind
with cautious promises
to come back.
Asphalt stretches ahead
black and endless
pointing to nowhere.

Let Harley’s hum
drown the chatter
in my head.
Let the rush
of the wind
become a mantra.
Let it be
perfect, for once.

Humpty Dumpty

Surely he knew it was dangerous
to lay his rounded surface on that high flat edge.
To stay up would take more balance and control
than his muscles could muster; their involuntary trembling
wobbled his delicate shell. Was this what he was thinking
when he ignored the fear in his yellow core
to climb that wall, sit, and wait for gravity to work?

To Write Poetry

You must cut your belly open
season your innards
with olive oil, kosher salt,
and fresh ground pepper to taste,
then sear your emotions
in a cast-iron skillet
to seal in the flavor.

When done, serve your soul
on Wedgwood china
lay the platter
at the reader’s feet
and walk away.

Chemical Bonds

Ionic Love


I give up my electron
to complete you,
then disappear.

Covalent Love

Two atoms half whole
find each other, share, bond
stronger than diamonds

Polar Covalent Love

I open to you
You keep your electrons back
Our bond falls apart

Road Kill

A lump of gray fur mashed
flat on the asphalt.
Something--once living--
didn't make it to the other side.

How will life end?
Like a squirrel
who crossed too soon
or waited too long
to seek fallen acorns?

Or like a baby raccoon
separated from the den
his tiny squeals crushed
under a two-ton pickup?


Or like a possum hissing
on the double yellow line
eyes locked with his doom?

May 1st

Rent is due.
Time to scrawl half the amount
in letters and numbers
sign illegibly at the bottom
then stuff a check in an envelope
with the one his girlfriend
taped to the bathroom mirror
before she left for work.
But her check and her toothbrush are gone
and he remembers the letter
he has to write.

But what to say?
Does he apologize for the screams of anger
boiled over from lies exposed,
the unrelenting sobs that followed?
The landlady used to say
they were such quiet neighbors
but now when he passes her
on the way to the garage
she just whistles.

Should he mention
that blackened spot on the carpet
stained with sex and vomit
from vodka that could not erase
the taste and smell of his lover
from his girlfriend’s mind?
The security deposit
just one more thing to give up
come June.

He needs more time to think
of the right words.
But for now, he writes
We are moving out.
This letter serves as last month’s notice.

Ellis Island

Lone light of this island
holds the dreams of the world.
Lady colossus.

Love

Love spreads from one heart to another
Natural,
As a bee spreads pollen
to flowers.

All at once the whole field is blooming.
Everywhere signs of spring.



~An imitation of Charles Simic's "Fear"

The Bull City

Brightleaf plants grew her ambitions
and with a lucky strike,
tobacco built stacks to honor her name.
When that flame died, she positioned herself
in the center of the Triangle
touting international educators
to lure biotech innovators as we traded
one drug for countless others.
The Flower of the Carolinas is blooming again
as the City of Medicine, as my home.

The Last Ride

The back roads
on the Harley.
Your helmet heavy
on my head.
My doubt heavy
on my shoulders
Our bodies lean
into the curve.
I hang on
though not tight.
I know you
won’t be back
no matter how
much you promise.
Just go faster.
Let the wind
erode my mind.

6th Inning Horror

Intentional walk
Then I hit the next batter
A pitcher's nightmare.